Warning: Strong Emotions Emitted

So, I'm told that wishing bad things to happen to evil people isn't a very good thing. By the way, this is a purging-of-emotions post.

My roommate is moving out. I'm going through the motions right about now. We had a conflict and instead of resolving it, she's running away from it. I know that she has been considering it for a while now (since before the conflict), but I can't help but think that somehow it's my fault. But I tried to resolve it. But I am still beating up on myself a little about the fact that apparently I'm a difficult person to live with. How does that work? We got along great for a year, and after one disagreement she can't take the time or make the effort to resolve it. This whole situation just makes me so upset. I don't need this now. I have two more finals to take. I just want to go home and be away from this. What makes it worse is the fact that I can in no way get to her. She has resolved herself to not talking to me and treating me as if I were less than someone deserving of any human connection. What's worse is that her boyfriend doesn't even treat us civilly. I know that I have done some things wrong. Oh, I would do so many things differently in the future. But I have tried. I have said I'm sorry. I have even agreed to disagree. I wanted to compromise, but apparently that is too much to ask. The more I think about this, the madder I get. I should probably stop. It's time like these that I feel the need to listen to some Ben Folds Five "One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces" and be resolved that someday she will pay. But that's not the right attitude. I know that. I should be studying. I'm already distracted. I've been distracted for the past two hours. The thing that pisses me off the most is that I can't do anything about it. She thinks that I am young, naive, and ignorant (forgive me for the redundancies). I may be younger than her, but I am not naive and I am not ignorant. I have been around for a couple of decades and have had the opportunity to observe and experience a few things myself. I know what life is about for the most part. I know that it's about growing up, learning from your mistakes, and trying your best to treat other people with kindness. So, what is MY problem? I'm blunt, and if I have a problem with you, I will tell you. Do note, however, that I am always willing to reach a compromise as long as I am not asked to lower my standards. Even if I don't agree with it, I hope I am willing to consider it. God help me with that.

I just want to go home. To get away from it, and, quite frankly, to be around people who I know will tell me that I'm not a horrible person and that I have great qualities and yadda yadda yadda. That's so dumb, but it's true.

Once again, please forgive the tone of this post. I obviously have a lot on my mind.